i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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