CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
