If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
