plz talk dirty to me
he shaved USA in his pubs
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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