oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize