I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
