I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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