Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
