She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
