Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You can't just leave with hair like that
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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