is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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