I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
