I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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