just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
