Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
