Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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