I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
