what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Randomize
