how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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