We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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