i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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