So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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