I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
