As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize