this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
