Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
