I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
