week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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