Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
