that's an acceptable place to lick
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
