I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
