So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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