ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
