Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
