Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
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