I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize