I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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