But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
