summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
