Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
