Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
