dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
