You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
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