It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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