I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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