Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
