your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
