Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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