"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
