I want to walk on stilts...naked
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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